Notes from Neen: Writing a book might break your heart (and why you need to cheer for every author you know) 🥂

WARNING: A massive amount of vulnerability follows. If that isn’t your thing right now because you have so much going on in your world, swipe and delete—I won’t take any offense at all! But, it’s equally important to talk about the stressors as the wins, right? Ok here goes…

You’ve heard me say that writing a book is like standing on stage totally naked, then slowly turning around, feeling every flaw, ridiculously vulnerable, and completely exposed.

And as​ Exceptional Experiences​ makes her way into the world, let me tell you: truer words have never been spoken.

The Spark You See—and the Storm You Don’t

On social media, you see me celebrating in pink, champagne glass raised high, traveling the world doing what I love, with people I love, in places I love—it’s incredibly awesome and 100% true, my life is filled with #ChampageMoments. But let me take you backstage for a moment—the silly sleepless nights before a launch caused by the crazy-town of my brain; the parade of self-doubt at 3 a.m. that makes me get up and doomscroll or make a million lists of things to do to help sell more books, the changes in my body from stress and lack of sleep, and those quiet what-ifs…what if no one turns up to my very first book launch at​ AKA Alexandria with the lovely Old Town Books​ and it’s just me, a barstool, and my bestie?

What if I’d done one more podcast, or launched on a different day, or invested more money, or agreed to more in-studio TV appearances, or learned about influencers (I didn’t and am still confused by that whole world), or what if, what if, what if—argh that question can haunt you! I wonder, would it feel different?

If you’ve ever thrown your whole heart into an idea or project and worried it might not matter, I see you. Believe me, I get you. That’s the invisible work beneath the surface-level sparkle.

You might ask yourself if it’s worth it? I know I have one million times, and my final decision is yes, it’s worth it—but the creative journey is not for the faint of heart.

If this is the first time you are reading my newsletter, I guess I should apologize for such a vulnerable installment—I promise this newsletter is normally filled with strategies and advice you can apply in your personal and professional life!

But for anyone who’s ever dared to bring a big dream to life and found it’s not all confetti and champagne—maybe you can relate?

The Reality: Why 3,000 Copies is a Milestone

Want some real talk from behind the scenes?

When I started this journey, I set an audacious goal to pre-sell 10,000 copies of Exceptional Experiences before launch. Everyone thought I was crazy. But my thinking was that back in 2018, I managed to pre-sell 7,000 copies of Attention Pays and I—optimistically (or arrogantly)—thought, “Let’s do it bigger!” figuring I had a larger client list, had been speaking for more years, and had developed an even stronger and more engaged newsletter subscriber list (big thank you for being a reader!).

Now, with just over 3,000 pre-sold, I’m not even halfway to my goal and less than two weeks out (can I hear you laughing… yeah me too, I know I am crazy). Does it sting a little? Of course! I am embarrassed to admit that it was my goal. Does it make me any less proud of what we’ve achieved? Absolutely not. My bestie Tamsen (not so gently) reminded me that 3,000 copies is more than some books sell in their lifetime.

Here’s the truth: the world is different now. People simply aren’t buying as many books. According to some research, about 22% of Americans read fewer than five books a year. For context, the average non-fiction book in the US sells around 250 copies a year, and very few crack 2,000 total in their lifetime.

But as leaders, we constantly have to make sure that we are keeping up with the latest information to not only improve ourselves, but help lead others as well. It’s important to carve out the time to read.

But let’s be honest: I’ve got at least five books sitting on my desk right now that I’m “reading” (well, intending to read, I often scan a book nowadays). If you’re anything like me—a multi-tasking, champagne-loving, to-be-read-pile collector—know that every time you actually buy, read, review, or share an author’s work, you are doing something extraordinary.

That’s why every single copy of Exceptional Experiences—especially those 3,000 pre-orders—means so much. Each one is a small, sparkling “yes” for big ideas, a vote for creativity, a sign that exceptional experiences truly matter. I wish there was a more powerful word than ‘grateful’ so you could understand how appreciative I really am. And yes, audio books count (what a ridiculous debate that is!)! I am here for it! ​You can find mine here,​ narrated by me!

People Will Surprise You (in Every Direction)

I always tell every new author that people will surprise them when they publish your book. Sometimes they go quiet or fade away and ignore you completely. Sometimes, love and support come from the most unexpected places. And some people shine so bright you’re left speechless (believe me, that’s not common for me who makes her living speaking to people from boardrooms and ballrooms!).

In my book, I refer to my Grand Cru (think of it as the author’s acknowledgements section), I write:

“Like the finest champagnes are made from a blend of only the most exceptional grapes, this book (and this journey) was shaped by my own Grand Crew—the sparkling group of souls whose every note, every bit of encouragement, and every act of belief added depth, flavor, and effervescence to my life.”

Here are a few extras I want to add to the list:

Noah: “I’m only on page 20 and already have 5 ideas for my business.” His one short text made me cry. Literally a highlight of this whole book journey. It made it real, a random validation of my hopes for the book that it would help those responsible for revenue to not only capture the attention of clients, but give them ideas they can apply immediately!

Kim: Human sparkle—posting about the book almost daily, cheering me on at every turn, and being willing to drive hours across Florida just to be at the ​Oxford Exchange​ book launch party. There are supporters, and then there is Kim.

​Tamsen​: My ride or die, walk-and-talk-me-off-the-ledge hotline, who has met more than one early morning “should I even do this-what-am-I-doing?!” meltdown with love and wisdom.

Michael: My bestie compass, keeping me focused and inspired when the road got wobbly and my text messages got even more “bananas” (as he says). I even reached out to him before I sent this to you because I was so scared of sharing it in the world. He reminded me of who I am and how I want to show up in the world.

​Jen​: The queen of spreadsheets, project managing every detail—giving me systems, order, and more clarity than I thought possible (I would have given up it if it wasn’t for her).

Jesse and the ​Page Two ​publishing team: Their constant words of encouragement, handwritten notes, cards, gifts, and never leaving a stone unturned to make this book a success. True publishing partners and dream-makers.

Irene: My Greek goddess—daily walk-and-talk therapy, unwavering encouragement, and a reminder that this journey is about celebrating the little joys too.

​Brittany​: Sage advisor, action-taker, and the kind of friend who literally sent 25 copies of my book to her clients just to show her support. That’s next-level love and because of her I am inspired to be an even bigger advocate for authors in future—she role models her brilliant and highly-recommended book, ​Creating SuperFans​.These are the people whose faith stitched me back together when I felt undone. Every email, text, wild act of belief, and moment of kindness reminded me: no book is ever written alone.

Have You Ever…?

Maybe you haven’t launched a book, but you’ve taken a leap that made you feel exposed or uncertain. Maybe it was a business, an application, a speech, your art, or your heart. If so, you get it. Who showed up for you? Who cheered, who bought, who showed up, who texted out of the blue? Are you picturing someone right now?

If you’ve never told them what it meant to you, today is a good day to make that happen! A simple call or text or even an email will make them smile, let me be your gentle nudge.